Celebrity Endorsements, Or Why I 'm More Willing To Vote For Who They Didn't Endorse

My opinion of endorsements may be myopic, out of synch, or profound like sand is succulent. Or I might be right in line with the statistical analysis that shows that endorsements are about as beneficial to a candidate as a Fox hosted debate is to Obama.

Whatever the case, I don't care for them much. Sure, I'm a big fan of Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, but I'm not holding my breath waiting for a press conference announcement on who they are supporting so I can fill in the right oval. As for newspaper endorsements, I'm not sure I'm going to be swayed by the editorial board of the Florida Times-Union, especially when they endorse city council candidates who they knew were continuously violating Florida' Sunshine Law.

The media, though, just can't seem to get enough of celebrity and political endorsements, which is why political elections are getting Grammy-style, Joan Riversesque attention and showcasing on Entertainment Tonight. Does it really take the bright light flare, Paris Hilton style, to move middle Americans away from their couches and into the voting booths? Maybe, but I have digressed.

Okay, back to the ever uninspiring endorsements of late. Obama got Oprah, Huckabee got Norris, McCain got Rudy and Arney, and Hillary got Bill. Who gives a crap? Sure, I love Bill, but even on his best campaigning day (was there one?), I still wasn't going to go for Hillary. And while I will always feel the Oscars have snubbed Norris' prolific film career, his love for Huckabee just isn't enough. Yet I never watch Oprah nor bought a book she recommended, but I still voted for Obama.

I think the better stories to be told on this subject are the ones about the movers and shakers who AREN'T endorsing anyone, for whatever reason. Gore has announced he's not taking sides. He's not stupid. He doesn't want to back the wrong team and be left eating solar panels and forced into groveling for support of his climate agenda. Reid and Pelosi are sitting quiet. And Edwards, while hosting secret tea parties for Hillary and eventually Obama, blew any chance to be relevant by staying mum in the days before Super Tuesday.

This all leads me to the conclusion that NOT getting a big name endorsement is the wave of the future and what all candidates should be aspiring for. In fact, I think that being able to announce proudly who ISN'T supporting your candidacy would carry so much more weight in the voters' eyes.

Imagine Obama standing in front of his usual 10,000+ crowd shouting, "And I am proud to say that Ben Affleck will not be endorsing me and my run for the White House!" I can just hear the roaring applause and the ringing of phones as people from all over the country start calling in their donations.

Of course, the better scene would have been one of Rudy standing in front of a crowd of U.S soldiers taking another fake cell call like the one he did in front of the NRA. "Excuse me guys, I have to take this. It's the president. -- Yes, sir. I'm talking to some soldiers right now. Do you want to say hello? No? (long wait, slow, deliberate nodding, wry smile forming, wait, wait). Okay. Thank you sir. Thank you very, very much (click). -- Well, it's good news. George wants nothing to do with my campaign!" Again, hooting and hollering, whistle calls, and centrists and independents around the country pulling out their wallets trying to shake out the loose quarters and pennies to drop in the next "Rudy for President" charity bucket they pass.

So from now on, when I'm on the fence, sweating profusely, unable to decide on which candidate to vote for as I stand at the Springfield Women's Club waiting to cast my ballot, I'm going to look to the candidate who didn't get endorsements from the likes of the Times-Union, Ralph Nader, or Richard Simmons.